An American Girl in Washington

Pasta, Penguin, and the President

Posted in Politics- as I see it by AGinDC on 31 August 2010

Today was rather uneventful.  I worked out, I found a new dermatologist (more on that laters), I discovered Friendship Heights, and I watched our adorable President give an excellent speech about the end of this awful war.

I watched the address in the new apartment of two of my friends, where we had delicious whole wheat pasta with vegetables and drank a Little Penguin Shiraz that I picked up that wasn’t half bad, especially given its $8.99 shelf price.  The three of us all come from very different backgrounds and points of view (a former Marine, a half-French girl et moi) but we all loved the President’s speech.  It was somber, respectful, and I personally loved that he was so gracious in mentioning the former President and that we all are Patriots who support our troops, regardless of our points of view on the war itself.

I was also relieved to see that the President was finally wearing a suit that seemed to be halfway tailored and not bought off the rack fifteen years ago like most of his other suits.  However, the cut was a little to metrosexual for my tastes, and I hate brown and red together.  But he’s so cute, he can pretty much pull off anything.  Except mom jeans.  No one can pull those off.

I also adore the pictures he has in the background of FLOTUS and the girls.  I am so insanely jealous of their perfect, gorgeous family but seeing them together makes me hopeful about what my future might possibly be and proud of the example that they’re setting.  And isn’t that what the First Family is all about?

All in all, another excellent performance by our remarkable President.  And one of our wars is finally, finally over.  I pray the next one ends sooner than expected and that we can finally bring our troops home to their family and their country.

Well done Mr. President!


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A stream of consciousness review of RHofDC Ep. 4

Posted in Real Housewives of DC by AGinDC on 30 August 2010

My non-cable lifestyle would be unbearable if it wasn’t for the internet.  As it is, I sometimes have to wait days for Megavideo to get a decent streaming copy of my favourite shows to find a free and legal way to watch my favourite shows.  I should get an iTunes season pass but broke ain’t no joke ya’ll.  Anyways, several days late, here are my notes on RHofDC as written at the time of viewing.  Were you thinking the same things?

Episode 4


Nope, Ebong is still not hot.

Onesies??  Ummm… do you know you’re on TV?  Those cameras are not just decorations.

Awwww… they’re a cute family.  Glad to see she’s a good mom.  Since otherwise she seems a little crazy.


Yeah, figures she’s a Delta.  She’s so nice.

Her mom is white?!?!?  Wow, I hope she writes a book about this story.  This is a movie waiting to happen.


LOVE Mary’s interview dress!

Ugh, Michaela.  Sponsoring?  Yeah right, there’s no way they’re paying for this.

Stop fighting over the gay black man!!!

Cat is NEVER happy.

Why does that wine look like cider?

I do agree with Cat here though, social climbing is obvious and embarrassing for you.  Just say no.

I like Dupont Circle too Lolly.  Makes me happy.

Why wasn’t Stacie at the TG event?

I wonder if Bravo makes them hang together?  I’ve always wondered this.  They must have a schedule.

Happy Thursday??  Oh, frenemies, how fake thou art.

AHHHHHH!!!!  Why does Mary look like Goth Cinderella???

Cat has no class, was she raised in the gutter??  By wolves?  Who had recently fallen off a turnip truck?

OMG, what is WRONG with Michaela and Tareq??  Can you imagine sneaking into THAT of all dinners?  They did this more than once??  Wow.

Yes Cat, brazen is the perfect word for them.

How many Burberry wraps does Mary own??

Wow, even Tareq’s MOM hates him?  I think that says it all.

“We want to make sure you’re safe”???  For a WINE TASTING?

Jason’s story either keeps getting more dramatic or the editing is very selective.  I vote both.

I love that it’s nighttime with Lynda in DC and the middle of the day in Virginia.

Oh, Cat.  STFU.

Thank you Michaela’s assistant!!

Who wears white pants to a grape stomping?

Yeah, those are definitely the same grapes chillin’ right now in my crisper drawer.  Stay classy Salahis.

Even with all of the Salahi’s bullshit, Cat is out of control.

I bet that wine isn’t really made there.  There are some illegals in the back pouring Three Buck Chuck into Salahi bottles.

Wow, I can’t believe they actually brought up the dinner story.

Thank you, polite Black people, for trying to change the subject.  But the Salahis are laughing a little too had.  Methinks the lady chuckles too much.

Stacie’s face at “she adores you” was CLASSIC!  And completely mirrored mine.

Why are they STILL talking about this shit??  Apparently, high school never ends.  Goody.

Michaela, why are you checking Mary’s facts with Stacie??



The Genius of Glenn Beck

Posted in Uncategorized by AGinDC on 28 August 2010

Today I had an epiphany:  Glenn Beck is the L. Ron Hubbard of politics.

He doesn’t believe a word he says but he knows that if he offers people a good story, a few celebrities, and something to spend their money on, they’re his.

I came upon this realization while walking on the Mall after the “I-couldn’t-disrespect-Dr.-King-more-if-I-tried” “rally” today.  As I wove my way through overweight white people in Ready to Wear by NRA, t-shirts announcing the presence of the “Tyranny Response Team” and more “Restoring Honor” merchandise than Sarah Palin’s made up words, it hit me.  “Jesus,” I thought, “How much money is he making on this thing?”

When you think about it, it can’t be that difficult to make millions off of people who are too stupid to Google the definition of socialism and will buy shady gold just because someone told them to on Faux News.  Anyone can fleece these people.  What makes Glenn Beck special is that he actually is.  With seemingly no remorse.  I mean, I can take candy from a baby any time I want to, but that doesn’t mean I’m walking around nurseries snatching Blow Pops.

And yet, here he is, holding giant fake rallies, selling embarrassingly badly written books, and crying on the set of his fake university.  He is purposefully and negligently misleading a lot of scared, lost, uneducated people at a time when their world is changing faster than they can keep up and what they really need is someone to teach them how to use a computer, teach their children to speak Chinese and teach them that, yes, in 2050 whites will no longer be the majority but it’s okay, we’ll only lynch some of you.  The rest we’ll use for slave labor.

Just kidding.

Sort of.

Instead, they get Dennis the Menace through the eyes of Mr. Wilson, scaring the shit out of them and using every tired, played out, unoriginal stereotype to do it, just so they’ll buy overpriced nonsense t-shirts and provide Beck with the very life he’s so busy denouncing.  The life they’ll never have.  Nice.

But then again, for white men, that’s what the American dream has always been about.  Using the hard work of others to make wildly outrageous fortunes for themselves and then getting those very same “others” so riled up about it that they keep them in power.

When is 2050 again?

More enlightened every day,


Deaf Poetry Jam

Posted in Uncategorized by AGinDC on 28 August 2010

I keep falling in love with poets.  Maybe that’s why Langston Hughes and Nikki Giovanni have always been the loves of my life.  Don’t worry FLOTUS, there’s always room in my heart for you.  But Gwendolyn Brooks and Lord Byron get a slice too.

Last night I went to the 6th Annual DC Poetry Festival at Rock Creek Park.  I also learned a hard lesson about following online directions.  The Park site said to take the Metro to Silver Spring and then take a bus to the park.  Since I had no idea where this place was, I followed those directions to a T, so I thought it was odd that the bus was taking me right back towards home!  Idiot.  The damn park is like 2 miles away from the Palace.  I crossed state lines for nothing!  Argh!  Oh well, I guess these are the lessons you learn when you’re new in town.

Anyways, I found out about this Festival in the fabulous WaPo Going Out Guide.  It said The Last Poets were going to be there and, once my heart started beating again, I knew I had to go.  I put it in my iCal and everything.  That’s what makes this story so tragic.

It started like a typical poetry slam.  The painfully loud sound system was a match made in heaven for poets who always feel the need to SCREAM into the mic.  But the first act was Droopy the Broke Baller and he was pretty great.  He’s a teacher and did a hilarious poem called Failin’.  Well, hilarious and sad because it’s true.  After Droopy was an 18 year old Egyptian girl who is very talented but clearly very young and still copying Def Jam’s style.  After hearing the requisite “I hate America” poem (halfway through I wondered what Glenn Beck would think if he was there.  Good Lord.) and a piece “in progress”, I had the same thought that I always do at these things:  In the end, all slam poetry sounds the same.  Well, 90% of it.  And that’s why those 10% get on HBO, it’s hard to make this stuff sound original.

After those two, there were a few more people in between who don’t stick in my mind.  I’m not one of those people who says a poem is “deep” when I don’t understand it.  I trust my intelligence enough to know that if I don’t get a play/poem/performance, it’s probably because it made no sense.  As a theatre major in college, we went to see a lot of off-off-off-off Broadway plays that had no plot, no coherent sentences, and nothing that could be readily identified as music, and yet when we left our professors would inevitably proclaim the performance as “deep” and “interesting”.  Sometimes, if it was really bad, they would even throw in a “thought-provoking”.  For a few years I thought that I must be missing something.  Maybe I wasn’t as smart or talented or in tune as I thought I was.  Then, I finally said something to a fellow student who said, “AG, they only say that shit because they have no idea what just happened and want to sound smart.”  AH-HAH!   So true.  So now, whenever someone says something is “deep”, I just give them the side-eye and keep it moving.

The above paragraph is what I was thinking during some of the poems.  I took notes.

Next in my notes is a reference to an adorable little Dominican Republican high school band.  These kids are cute and will be really good once they hit puberty and replace the instruments that they stole from their junior high band room with the real thing.  But they’re tryin’, and I respect that.

Next was an artist whose name I won’t mention because I don’t want to dis her just because she wasn’t my style.  Also, if I don’t mention her name I can be brutally honest.  Is this wrong?  I don’t know.  But I feel bad.  Anyways, this chick walks up in six-inch heels and a tiny ass jumpsuit and tells us to fist pump for Sarah Vaughn.  Really?  It quickly dawned on me that she thinks she’s Dorothy Dandridge reincarnated.  She’s not.  We were also desperately in need of Simon Cowell.  Just because you grew up hearing that you’re the great great granddaughter of a great jazz musician does not mean talent is genetic.  It isn’t.  Well, maybe with the Jacksons, but not with you.

Other general slam poetry notes that are specifically relevant to this chick:

1.  Just because you talk fast doesn’t mean you’re saying shit.  I talk like Speedy Gonzales and I’ve         never said anything worth repeating.

2.  Contrary to what Kanye might tell you, a few catch phrases does not a rap song make.  Or                   “deep” poetry.

3.  Your outfit and your message (if you have one, which she didn’t) have little to nothing to do               with each other.  Just because you think you look cute does not mean that your verses are                         slammin’.

Nuff said.

After Jessica Rabbit got off the stage we heard from two super talented poets who together make up the Beauty and the Beast tour (I googled for a link but couldn’t find anything).  Them I loved.

Then came a man I’d like to marry, or, at least, I’d like to marry the man he’s telling other men to be, Rodzilla the Blackademic.  Sigh.

Finally, after a few older gentlemen felt the need to delight us with their story-telling talents just because they’re old and important and are allowed to do that sort of thing (they weren’t bad though), the second-to-the-main attraction began.  This is where things got tragic.

The Cornel West Theory sounds like they should be okay.  I mean, I like CW, and I like theory, and if it’s all wrapped up in a slam poetry package, why not?


First of all, one of their dudes was like the black Kramer.  I don’t know how he got his body to contort like that while rapping barefoot on a nasty stage, but he did.  Sadly, his lyrical contortions were not nearly as impressive.  Mostly, I wanted to kill myself.  There were six of them, each more depressing than the last.  To be fair, they were a little like Cornel West: probably brilliant, but so highfalutin’ that you can’t really tell and trying to hard to be hip for you to really care.  I was desperately trying to make it through by reminding myself that The Last Poets were next, but combined with the two hours of opening acts, the raging mosquitos, and the fact that I was searching for my Swiss Army Knife so I could slit my wrists and be done with it, once homegirl started singing what can only be described as a Martian mourning song, I was DONE.  I bounced out of there and caught the next bus to Adams Morgan.

Sorry Last Poets, I’ll visit you on the YouTube.

So, that was my night out.  I love the poetry festival, love that there were tons of people there, love that it was free (yaay taxpayers!).  But, like all slam poetry, it was time to go long before it was over.

See you at the 7th!


DIY Furniture

Posted in Uncategorized by AGinDC on 26 August 2010

Today and yesterday have been pretty uneventful.  I had an interview that turned out to be mis-scheduled due to the employer’s mistake, I read a little, watched a little TV, did very little research, and today I went to Ikea!  I love Ikea.  Don’t you?  Doesn’t everyone?

The wonderful but sad thing about the Palace is that there really isn’t anything that I need to buy for the house.  Luckily, my friend who just moved to an apartment a few blocks away is in need of everything so I got to do some heavy-duty Ikea shopping vicariously through her.  Since neither of us brought automobiles we rented a Zipcar, which are so easy to get here in DC.  In Ann Arbor there were only a few places with a few auto options and by the end of law school I had driven them all.  However, here in DC there are tons of cars, from Mini Coopers to Volvos and there are parking spots everywhere, there’s even one on my street!  LOVE.  Today we got a Honda CR-V (which made me miss my lovely little totaled CR-V) and packed it full of boxes and blue bags and various toys and sundries. Now that I know that Zipcars are so close, I may be using them more often, like, for instance, to visit the two new Nordstrom Racks that I heard about on the radio in the Zipcar.  There’s nothing a Seattle girl loves more than a Nordstrom, except, of course, for a Nordstrom Rack!

So, Ikea was lovely and fun and Swedish and we had a marvelous time.  Then we came home and had our assess kicked at a super intense class at Mint (has anyone ever done TRX before?  I just got a taste today and I LOVE it!) and then we had omelets and put together her Ikea furniture.

Good times were had by all, but as I was walking home down 18th street and saw all the guys and dolls dressed up and having a fabulous time, I couldn’t help but think about my own lost social life and wonder when, if ever, I’ll start making some friends and having fun again for myself.  Sigh.

Oh well.  ‘Til then, I’ll keep putting together someone else’s furniture.



Dinner and a movie

Posted in Uncategorized by AGinDC on 24 August 2010

This weekend the fabulous Going out Guide in WaPo clued me in to a pretty awesome event happening this evening.  Apparently, the Renaissance Hotel on New Hampshire Ave has been having free movies screenings all summer.  Tonight was the last one, of course, but I really wanted to go so I grabbed a friend and, after a semi-tortuous floor barre session at the gym, we headed to the hotel.  I really like this place because the lobby is set up to be really social.  There’s free wifi, comfy couches, an approachable bar… it’s all very “come sit and stay all day”.  I like that.

Tonight, the lobby was packed.  There were tons of people, old, young, families, singles, etc.  Even some of the staff were watching the movie.  I have no idea what the film was called (we got there late) but it was in Hebrew with English subtitles and was apparently put on in conjunction with the Jewish Film Festival that will be happening in DC in December.  The movie was hilarious, a very cute romantic comedy about an Argentinian immigrant in Israel.  We loved it and loved the atmosphere.  I wish I had known about this sooner!

After the film we were starved so we headed to Cafe Oaxaca (pronounced wa-HA-ca), a fun little Mexican cafe where we had marvelous margaritas, great guacamole and tasty tacos.  The tres leche looked to die for but we were so stuffed at the end of the meal that we couldn’t bear the thought of dessert.  Next time.  I also loved the service, our waiter was funny and had a great personality and even though we had to wait a while between sightings, it was nice to be around someone who was clearly having fun on the job.

Overall, another great night in DC.  And thank goodness the weather is cooling down, tonight was a perfect evening.  If you know of any other great events happening in town, please let me know!

Thanks for stopping by,


Two delicious DC staples

Posted in Uncategorized by AGinDC on 23 August 2010

Tonight I had the privilege of discovering two delicious DC staples- Pizzeria Paradiso and Larry’s Ice Cream.  Both were gastronomical delights and both will be regular stops for me from now on.

First, my darling and adorable friend Yosh (whom I appreciate so much more after she showed off her vintage Stewart Weitzmans.  I love having fashionable friends) had dinner at P.P.  I had never been before and wasn’t sure if I should trust her when she said they have “delicious pizza”.  Many have made that lofty claim and few have lived up to the promise.  But, as usual, Yosh did not disappoint.  I had the Atomica pizza, a delicious blend of tomato, mozzarella, salami, olives, and hot pepper flakes.  The toppings were incredible, fresh and generous, but what really makes this pizza is the crust.  It’s thick, crunchy, and hot and is obviously heated in a divine oven filled with tiny fire-breathing dragons after the crust is mixed with fairy dust and rolled with the tiny hands of tiny elves.  Or at least, that’s what it tasted like.

In fact, the pizza was second only to the wonderful conversation that I always have with Yosh.  I’m devastated that she’ll be leaving for London soon but so lucky that she’s here in DC for now.  😉

After the pizza I was in dire need of ice cream (as always and contrary to my new nutritionist’s instructions… oops) so Yosh insisted that we head over to Connecticut Ave to try Larry’s homemade ice cream.  O.M.G.  I had a scoop of lavender and a scoop of vanilla and I was in heaven.  The lavender was light and creamy and tasted just like lavender smells.  The vanilla, and I consider myself a connoisseur of vanillas, was divine.  I tasted each minuscule little bean as it bounced around my taste buds, rolled down my tongue and into my waiting tummy.  Yum.

One of my favourite things about DC is all of the amazing local restaurants and boutiques.  In fact, WaPo featured a few amazing local designers who I will definitely be patronizing often:  Artistic Aya, Hugh and Crye, and Treasury.  I’m all about supporting local talent and with talent like this, I’ll have the best wardrobe in the city in no time!  Go there!  Shop!  Support local artists!

Live long and prosper,


A stream of consciousness review of RHofDC

Posted in Real Housewives of DC by AGinDC on 22 August 2010

Having no cable at the Palace, I am not able to watch Real Housewives of DC on Thursday nights.  I’ve been waiting and waiting for Bravo to post the full episodes but for some reason they suck and won’t do it, so today I had to log onto Sidereel and watch Episodes 2 and 3 all in a row.  I was going to type up my notes into paragraph format but then I realized that no RH deserves that kind of formality (not even the deliciously disastrous New Yorkers), so I’m posting as is.  Enjoy!


salahi dude obviously only bought all that shit because he was on tv.  44 is not a big enough year for a horse.  and what the hell kind of grown woman names a horse sparkle??  also, 44???  i thought for sure she was at least 50.

I like Mary.  That giant dog would have to GO!  i don’t need all that hair and shit in my house!  but i love that she learned/speaks spanish with her housekeeper, so many people don’t even try to learn and treat their housekeepers like dirt because they don’t speak english.  YAAY for being semi-culturally sensitive!

Cat is so rude, kids come home!  And why is this her business?? Cat has no emotional intelligence at all.  In every scene, she’s offending people and can’t see from their obvious reactions that she should stop.  Which is so not British.  Brits are usually super reserved and polite.  Maybe that’s why she left.

Paul!  Stop lying!  You do not love that name!  Also, that is exactly how I plan my parties, i start with the blacklist and move up from there.  The fact that Paul likes Michaele makes me want to give her the benefit of the doubt.

I thought Stacy(ie?) was going to be boring because she and her hubs and kids are just so cute and nice and such a good family and that ish just doesn’t work on Real Housewives.  But, I can tell that she likes being an instigator, which is hilaaaarious.  Love.

Really Michaele?  “I am the wife of a rider so I have to look the part?”  And lessons and everything??  Who the hell are these people?  Oh, I know.  These are people like some of the kids in law school.  They don’t know how to have friends so instead they try to use their money to buy them.  boring.  And how many times do you have to clink glasses?  And what, what did you just say?  You served beer because the BARN doesn’t hold a lot of wine??? I’ve fit bottles of wine in my PURSE, you can’t fit a bottle or two in the BARN??

No, this is NOT fair!  You cannot show Aunt Francis cooking while I am sitting here starving!!  Wrong, wrong, wrong.

I want a closet with a ladder in it.

Cat!  You did not just do that!  Could you be ruder?  She has NO upbringing.  I want this show to be about Paul and Aunt Francis.  I love old black ladies who drink Scotch.

Ummmm… the penile WHAT?  Slippage is real.  Best. Quote. Ever.

Ebong is not a good looking man.  He has all of the right qualities but they’re not put together in the best way.

I’m hungry!!!  This is just not right!! Aunt Francis, where are you??

Yup, recycle the Crisco.  Also, I love the people dancing in the background. What’s their story?

No Stacie!  Don’t blame this on the Brits!!  They’re not like this!

Also, is there only one gay man in DC who has to serve as the bf for all wealthy women?  I have at least three gay bf’s, would they like to borrow one?

what the hell do they do with models in DC?  hire them for embassy parties? no, I’m serious, what do they do with them?

Wait!  They showed up in a limo with a “police escort” at someone else’s party?!?!?!   who iiiisss this bitch?  I hate the Salahis.  Loved her dress, but HATE them.

i hope paul had a good time at his party.  they should have invited aunt francis.


Sugarleaf Vineyards.  i think i just found my local wine!

**Note:  I kind of spaced out here for a bit.  Two RH episodes in a row is a bit much.**

LOVE that mary’s kids are in public school

i bet michaele doesn’t even know what her husband does.  and i have no comment about paul’s party except that he better not have to pay for that ish.  poor paul.  i ❤ him.

stacie and hubs are so cute!  i love love love seeing such a beautiful couple who are so down to earth in their every day relationship.  it makes me hopeful!

Michaele’s reaction to Stacie’s story was surprisingly human.  Linda is right, Tareq is the bad influence here.

Oh Paris, I miss you.  I haven’t seen you in so long… I need a job so I can plan a trip.

There’s a fashion world in DC??  PS, props to Mary for showing up on TV with no makeup.

Oh gay men and your love of starting trouble.  This is why we get along.

Thank GOD the black people on this show are all SANE!  way to represent people, you’re steady making up for ATL.  The white women, however, are so inappropriate.  DIANA ROSS??  Thank you Erika for telling the truth.  I don’t know who you are thank you.  And no, Cat, you are SO inappropriate.  Paul, don’t let her get away with thinking there is nothing wrong with what they say.

Well, ok, Tareq is annoying but it is his job to defend his wife… he just has no sense and no class and no upbringing and no manners so he does it in the only way he knows how.

You’re right Linda, “lose the husband” indeed.  Was this reality show foreshadowing?? Hmmm…



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Friday night on the town

Posted in Uncategorized by AGinDC on 21 August 2010

Friday was quite the eventful day.  First, I had an interview!  It was for a position at a really nice hotel which I won’t name in case I get it.  We’ll just call it Upscale Hotel.  To get there, I had planned the morning perfectly but I somehow managed to get out of the door 15 minutes late, thus ruining everything.  Then, I got on the first bus that came to the stop, which of course was going the wrong way, so I had to get off and run 3/4 of a mile down the street in flip flops to get to the hotel only eight minutes early.  That gave me just enough time to throw on my heels, cardigan, and pearls and go to the bathroom to dry off (I am officially the sweatiest person in DC) before coming out just in time to meet the Manager.  After that though, the interview went great and I have a second interview next week, after which I’ll find out if I got the job.  What I like about this hotel gig is that it’s an easy assignment that won’t take a lot of time or thought, giving me plenty of energy to do my research project and work on the book, but, if I like it, there is lots of room for growth and I can go into something that I love and am really good at, like event planning.  It’s a win-win.

Second, two of my friends from law school got to town and I’m so happy that they’ve finally moved to DC (Yaay!).  To thank me for giving them a place to stay they treated me to a delicious lunch at Bistrot Du Coin on Connecticut Ave.  We had mussels and wine and creme brulee and it was delicious.  I also absolutely love how convenient the Palace is, it’s so close to everything!  I may never leave this neighborhood.

Later, I met a friend and her new bf for happy hour at Urbana.  Urbana is absolutely wonderful.  Joe the bartender actually asked me what kind of gin I wanted with my G&T, which almost never happens and which I totally appreciated because I ❤ Bombay Sapphire and never get it without asking.  The happy hour menu was great, they have wines and beer for $5 and a specialty cocktail for the same price.  They also have $8 pizzas, $5 small plates and $1 each oysters.  We had ah-mazing crab beignets and delicious margherita pizza and lots of sparking wine.  After, we had talked off all of the calories so we headed to Levante’s on 19th where I had a yummy falafel salad and my friend had delicious lamb.  I don’t remember what her bf had but he ate it all so it must have been good!

All in all it was a day and night of conversation, fiery debate, and delicious food.  My favourite combo.  As usual, my friend with the bf (like all of my friends with bfs when they’re around me) was quiet and demure and beautiful and perfect and went home with a guy who is at least not a serial killer, while I was fiery and passionate and debated and couldn’t hide my too-big personality and thus sat in the Palace alone.  More than one person has told me that I’m the kind of girl men have affairs with and not the kind of girl they marry.  Too bad I don’t believe in having affairs… Well, as long as my friends are happy, I’ll pass the nights with my Form 6.  Too bad for me, but the personality just isn’t going away.  I’m going to have to wait for a man with the cajones to take me on…

I wonder if he’s in DC?

Signed, happily content,


Just because Bitch is the New Black doesn’t mean I have to be one

Posted in Uncategorized by AGinDC on 19 August 2010

Yesterday I got a lesson in humility.

A few months ago, I, like every single black girl in America, got a ton of ranting emails and forwarded blog posts from almost everyone I know about the then-recent WaPo interview of a now-notorious DC girl: Helena Andrews.  Due, apparently, to biased editing, Ms. Andrews came off as exactly the kind of girl the rest of us pretend we’re not.  The article made her sound arrogant, narcissistic, materialistic, and, worst of all, picky about men.  Ouch.  I read the article and all of the blog posts and had many, many, angry conversations with my friends about how it is just this kind of woman that the makes the rest of us work so hard to restore reputations that we haven’t even had the fun of ruining ourselves.  We were angry, judgmental, and swore we would never, ever buy her book“Bitch is the New Black”.

The months passed.

Yesterday, I picked up a copy of DC Mag at the gym and who should be featured in an adorable dress and super fly suede booties?  Yep, Helena Andrews herself. Since the blow-up cooled down I haven’t heard much about Ms. Andrews, except reading somewhere that she actually knows MoDo, which only intensified my mere dislike into a burning, passionate, jealous hatred.  Other than that though, I hadn’t given her two thoughts.  But here she was in very respectable shoes, giving an interview that made her sound, dare I say it: nice.  Hmph.

I decided to investigate.

Somehow, I ended up on the One Degree From Me blog, and, while I was momentarily blinded by the hotness that is Paul Carrick Brunson (Jesus, even his name is hot), my attention was quickly recaptured by his video interviews of H.A.  A few notes:

1.  The interview starts right off with a hilarious sketch that makes fun of her “Diva” image.  I love a girl who can make fun of herself.  H.A.- 1: Bad Reputation- o

2.  She seems cool.  Down to earth.  Funny even.  With a little bit of snark.  Oh, and attractive too, which would add serious insult to injury if she wasn’t also clearly very smart.  Hmmmm… H.A.- 2: Rep- 0

3.  She had a lot of really good answers to P.C.B.’s very good questions (I think they were good questions but, honestly, every time he started to talk I sort of drifted off into dreamland…).  H.A.- 3: Rep- still 0

4.  This was the clincher.  The intro to the second part of the interview was great.  I laughed, I cried… okay, not really, but I did decide that maybe this girl was aiight after all.  Sigh.  H.A. for the win.

And so, a lesson has been learned.  a) Never trust WaPo; b) jealousy can make you hate someone who may actually be able to teach you some things; and c) if this is my competition in DC, I’m seriously in trouble.  In fact, I’m going back to the gym.  Now.

So, mental apology to H.A.  I feel bad.  I’m ordering your book on Amazon Prime today.  I’ll read it.  I’ll probably like it.  It may make me hate you for a minute, but I’ll get over it.  After all, the worst part about all of this was that I saw a lot of myself in those interviews, from the saying things as a joke that maybe WaPo misinterpreted to the having to constantly back-track (i.e. the racial profiling MoDo incident) to the being an overly educated black girl with great shoes but no man.  Sigh.  Maybe we should all just stick together for a change?  I know I’ve learned my lesson.

With humility and mad respect,


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